firefly

posted june the 27th,'06

i was walking down home today, after a very rightfully frustrating day, when i noticed a firefly by the side of the road close to my house. i picked the firefly up and gently placed it in my palms, started walking again but never removing by eyes from the firefly. i let it wonder and wander in the intricacies of my palm, wondering about the mechanics or the logical, rational, scientific explanation to its light emission. Nevertheless, being utterly impressed a sudden sadness dawned over me and a concomitant sense of responsibility took over me for i had lifted it from its native dwelling. i had to discard all thoughts of adoption, feeding and watching it every night in awe. i couldn't just keep it now could i?; i gently blew it away for it stuck onto the beads wrapped around my right wrist...
after a huge day and body failure due to exertion, i lay half past dead on the floor staring at nothing but the diminishing ceiling at my friend's place. i knew i had come a long way but i also knew that i had miles to go before i slept. i couldn't muster enough courage to embark on another painful journey back home. i was sapped both mentally and physically. i couldn't move my appendages, and i let out a cry. Had i been at home my mother would have knelt over my half dead body and taken care of it, i could recall her face vaguely as if she was asking me how i was feeling and if i could fake a smile and pretend nothing was wrong. No mother, i couldn't, i just couldn't and i fell into this slumber...
i couldn't get up but i did manage to drag myself off the mat, dispelled a look around and joined my friends in the balcony, wondering if they were eating or planning to eat anything or and the concern of not reaching home on and in time. Sieving the details, smokes were arranged and tea was prepared, cookies were laid out; i couldn't get over the hangover of the dying embrace. tomorrow i embark on my life's most important journey; it is a very strong possibility that what happened today decides the fate of the circumstances. with the break of drawn, i set out on my travesty with no clue as to what lies ahead though i have this remarkable ability to prognosticate but i do not wish to do so in this case, i shall leave it to god this time. Under such circumstances i usually pick up and light a smoke, and blow off my worries but not this time.

'the still waters of the waters under a frond of stars...
the still waters of your mouth under a thicket of kisses...'